memeisteria | Magisteria Text Mingle #1

Magisteria Text Mingle #1

Please note: This meme is OTA and is essentially an extension of the TDM!

You are welcome to voice test or just have fun here!

TEXT MINGLE #1: CYBERCHARM 💞

One way or another, if you find yourself opening your aXess Link device, you may notice a curious pre-installed application. It's called CyberCharm! Otherworlders skeptical or curious alike, and feel compelled to investigate this program, will notice that the interface's AI has been hit with a glitch, causing users to discover a pre-generated dating profile has already been filled out for them. If any users wish to change or delete their profile, they must do so before anyone else responds, otherwise they could be saddled with an embarrassing pre-generated profile! Once responded to, users are locked out of changing it for the next month! So please make certain you are satisfied with your profile before it's too late!

NOTES

CyberCharm Profie:

<div style="height:300px;background:#ddd;font-size:20px;text-shadow:1px 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5);">
		<div style="height:300px;background:url(!!!YOUR IMAGE HERE!!!)center;background-size:cover;display:flex;align-items:flex-end;justify-content:center;">
			<div style="padding:0 0 250px 0;"></div>
		</div>
			<div style="padding:0 0 10px 0;"></div>

</div>

<div style="padding:15px;border-bottom:1px solid rgba(0,0,0,0.1);" align="left">
		<b style="font-size:22px;color:#4e3188;">CHARACTER NAME</b><br>
		<i>AGE / PRONOUNS / SEXUALITY</i><br>
<b>HEIGHT:</b> HEIGHT<br>
<b>BODY COUNT:</b> BODY COUNT<br>
<b>IDEAL DATE:</b> DESCRIPTION HERE<br>
	</div>

<div style="padding:20px;max-height:300px;overflow:auto;box-sizing:border-box;line-height:1.6;" align="left">
		!!!ABOUT YOUR CHARACTER HERE!!!
	</div>

</div></lj-raw></center>

Guidelines:
1. Please fill out the provided code below! You may write it in the IC style of your character, or as the CyberCharm app would have provided for them. You may modify the code to your heart's content!
2. The app's system is a little confused, and isn't quite sure what body count means. Could it be how many people you've slept with, or does it mean how many people you've killed? Feel free to respond to this however you see fit.
3. Respond to other profiles with the ✖ / PASS! or 💖 / MATCH!
4. ???
5. PROFIT!
(Inspiration for this event has been taken from

synflux)

✖ / PASS! / 💖 / MATCH!

(CODE)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"It is rather. I've always liked parks. And gardens. Ever since the first one." He tips his head back onto the back of the bench, staring up at the sky. "Peaceful little worlds, tamed and cultivated. The universe in miniature--set it up and let it grow. Like nebulae."

Rhea'li's grasp on astronomy is still rather shaky despite having been amongst the stars, so an ear flicks at mention of unfamiliar terminology. The way Crowley speaks, there's something about it that reminds him of the long lived dragons. Speaking of things long past as though it were yesterday, of experiences that shorter lived things could not possibly grasp in its entirety.

"What did you do before you were drawn here?" The corner of his mouth curls up into a small smile. "Not a gardener, surely?"

"Complicated question, that. Most recently, not much, I've been sort of... unemployed, that last couple of years, one could call it? Before that, well. I'm a demon. My job was to spur humans to acts of sin." He tilts his head to the side, cracking his neck. "Probably would prefer gardening, honestly. I've got houseplants. Had, I suppose, they're presumably still in my car, and my car isn't here. I hope one of the neighbors rescues them."

Demon? Like, a voidsent? Hm.

"Is that so?" Rhea'li leans back in the bench and stretches his legs out. "If you prefer it, you could take it up here. Who we were before means very little here."

Some people would find that daunting.

"Have to make money somehow, apparently. Never done that before. Not sure what employable skills I have, really. Gardening might be worth a try, if anyone's looking for one. Doubt anyone's looking for nebula engineering even if I hadn't been somehow divested of the ability to perform miracles. I was a nanny once, I suppose I could do that again. I like kids."

It's a bit daunting, but also astonishingly freeing. Hell isn't watching him. No one's going to come at him with holy water. Actually, he should probably find out if holy water even exists here, though he's not sure how he'd manage a test of whether it still worked the same.

What does all that even mean? Nebula engineering? Performing miracles? Rhea'li's expression remains pleasant and placid even as most of his thoughts are filled with ???

But the mention of not having made money before gives him a mild prick of worry for Crowley.

"If you've never made money," and it seems like he at least has a grasp of what currency and a paying job is, "then how did you manage your necessities?"

“Miracles or minor theft covered fun—like any time I decided to eat that Aziraphale didn’t pick up the bill, or my CD collection—and Hell’s billing department covered housing. Got kicked out of that when I stopped falling in line so my replacement could have it. Was living in my car after that, mostly. So I suppose I was sort of working for money, but not for humans, and not for any kind of articulated salary. More… room and board. And I doubt anyone here is going to pay me to make a motorway more evil.” Crowley is not getting any less confusing, sorry Rhea’li.

Aziraphale... the friend? He doesn't know half the terms being thrown around here, but Rhea'li is very, very good at keeping a placid expression and looking like he understands. He's also very good at pushing through a conversation while knowing nothing.

So Rhea'li replies with a wry smile, "Nay, it does seem rather unlikely you would be paid to make a motorway more evil here."

These days most of his money matters are handled by another, but...

"So you've not had to think about money then. Would you... like assistance with your finances once you have employment?"

Rhea'li is absolutely doing a great job at being easy to talk to.

"It was one of my neater jobs, really. Couple of tricky bits, and then it just ran itself after that. No one really appreciated it, though, they were all about the individual temptations, getting one man to have lustful thoughts or something, rather than the sort of bulk evil from making a motorway into an arcane sigil or knocking out the phone network for an entire city. No appreciation for efficiency." It's not like he likes hurting people, but he did have some good ideas for evil sometimes. "Upper management thought enough of it to keep me in place, anyway."

"Are you an... accountant?" Crowley blinks. He doesn't look the type. "I, ah. Hm. Well, I'm not used to having to think about how much things cost. Probably harder to just miracle away even if I did have my proper abilities back, with everything digital--cash is much easier... Should I have a budget? No idea how to do that."

Listening to Crowley speak of his previous job with some bemusement, Rhea'li can't help but have the impression Crowley was a rather... avoidant henchman-like being with good mind to come up with great ideas to allow him to do as little work as possible.

At being called an accountant, however, both of Rhea'li's ears twitch in both surprise and amusement. "An accountant? Hm, I suppose you could say 'tis related to my work."

In the sense that he was trained as one, sort of kind of.

"For budgeting, you ought to at least know the amount of money you are earning and the cost of your necessities like food and board. You will wish to keep some extra aside for extra expenses, so don't spend it all at once."

"You seem more interesting than I thought accountants were, to be honest." Also, very expressive ears. Is it hard to lie with ears like that?

"Ugh, necessities. I'm not even sure if I have to eat? Now that some time has passed I'm started to feel a little more like myself. Can't do much in the way of miracles still, but I can sense some of the things I'm supposed to be able to again. And I can probably manage something tiny, like..." he casts around for an idea, then shrugs and snaps his fingers. The palm of his other hand fills with a small pile of frozen peas, which he chucks into the pond. "Good for fish as well as ducks, should be fine. So I might not need to eat? But... I'll have to figure out... how much a place to live costs and... decide on one, I guess? Not something I've had a lot of say in before." Hell picked his flats.

Rhea'li lets out a huff of a laugh at the compliment, the tip of his tail twitching.

But eating is one of the greater pleasures of life... at least in Rhea'li's eyes.

It seems he was right about creation, but Rhea'li hides his interest in the miracled peas by pushing on with the current conversation. "Aye. Often a larger or more comfortable location will cost more. If you've no need for food, you can allocate more funds towards room and board if you do desired."

He gestures with a hand as he continues.

"One can share with others to reduce costs, though that can come with its own trials and hardships."

“I wonder if I can just get a decent car. It wouldn’t be my Bentley, but… I’ve lived in my car before. And if I’m going back to normal I shouldn’t actually need to sleep and faff about with a bed and such. Are there car loans here? I think people usually get loans for cars…”

At the mention of sharing space, Crowley makes a strange face. “I’m not sure it would go well for me or anyone else to share a flat.” He’d sort of wanted to live with Aziraphale, before fucking Gabriel managed to steal a march on that one somehow. “I don’t really know how humans… act in their homes. And I’d probably spoil the milk or swap the salt and sugar or something out of sheer habit.”

It's a good thing he at least knoes what a car is, thanks to John Wick explaining. And if Crowley wants to live out of his car, then who's he to judge? He's personally spent more time travelling than in a fixed location, so the idea of owning or renting housing for a long time feels rather quaint.

And surely Crowley wouldn't really intentionally cause minor problems all the time, right? ...Right?

"While 'tis true living with others can come with annoyances and grievances from our differences, it can also be comforting and enjoyable experience."

Rhea'li smiles, hands on idle motion as he talks, "Though I must confess, I was often travelling. So the idea of living in the same place for days on end... I cannot say I find it appealing."

"You do a lot of... enjoyable living with others, then?" His only point of reference for living with others is the cramped and miserable accommodations of Hell, which do not endear him to the concept. "How d'you find someone you can even stand being around?"

"Maybe you should get a car too. Or one of those... campervans or something, if they have those here." The hurdle of 'being able to drive' doesn't really occur to him. Arguably he's barely actually able to drive, without miracles it's likely to go badly. This also hasn't occurred to him yet.

He's piloted a giant robot, how hard can driving a car be in comparison? (Do not let Rhea'li drive.)

Rhea'li lets out a quiet laugh. "Talk to people, as you and I are. Talk to them often enough and you may find their company enjoyable. And if your circumstances align, boarding with them will seem like the most logical option."

Stretching out his legs, he throws an arm over the back of the bench before he asks, "What manner of vehicle is this... campervan?"

"Not really used to conversing with mortals long-term. Or... well, anyone really, other than-- my friend." Who is thoroughly out of reach, being both in Heaven and in possibly a different universe. Ugh. He grimaces and shifts the topic. "I doubt much of anyone would find my extended company... congenial, given my habits and inclinations." It's not like even his houseplants enjoyed living with him. He's still been a demon for thousands of years, even if he can barely miracle up a handful of peas at the moment.

"A campervan is like... a big car with a tiny house stapled to the back? So there's a bed you can sleep in, and a small kitchen, tiny bathroom. But you can move it wherever you like. Provided no one's fining you for parking there, anyway." Crowley gestures vague as he talks, sketching an incoherent shape in the air with his hands. He hasn't really made a concerted study of campervans.

Rhea'li tilts his head up, trying to imagine a vehicle of indeterminate proportions with a tiny house attached to the back. It sounds... fascinating. Genuinely, he's interested in this now form of transportation and housing all at once.

With a little smile, he says, "Well... mayhap you would consider this conversation and future conversations as practice?" He holds up his device and shakes it a little. For the first time, he sounds a little uncertain. "I believe you can contact others through this?"

"Looks like you could do, anyway. Resembles cell phones on Earth." He holds up his not-phone and squints at it. "You have to have contacts for people to contact them, I think? My Earth one I could just tell to call Aziraphale and it knew where his phone was, but that's miracles again. And I don't hardly know anyone here even if I could miracle them a text message or whatever. Did you know there's a bloke on the dating app who's a demon-slayer? I'm both unusually open about what I am and unusually vulnerable, right now. Ugh."

"I mean, you seem nice. But 'nice' doesn't usually go well with 'demon'."

Earth? What an incredibly generic name for the land Crowley comes from. But he's not judging.

Ah. He can see why Crowley would be concerned. Hopefully the demon-slayer has the sense to understand that what they were before doesn't necessarily apply upon this star. Rhea'li would put himself between the demon-slayer and Crowley if it came to that, however...

"Doesn't it?" His tail flicks once in amusement. "But you seem rather nice, yourself."

“Euuugh.” Crowley grimaces, almost moves instinctively to clap a hand over Rhea’li’s mouth before he catches himself. “Suppose there’s no one here to haul me back to Hell for punishment because they caught wind of me being nice. Not like before. Really caught it that one time I stopped a girl topping herself. Ugh.” He twists his head uncomfortably, cracking his neck. “Not meant to be good people, or… tolerable to good people.” The idea of someone else wanting to protect him, other than maybe Aziraphale sometimes, is unfathomable, it would never occur to him that anyone might want to bother.

Rhea'li's tail flicks again, not startling at all when Crowley suddenly moves.

He rests his chin on his hands. "Do you wish to be good people, then?"

"...Dunno. Never really thought I'd have the option. I mean, I don't... I've never wanted to... I saved Job's kids when they were supposed to get killed, and barely managed to get away with it. I've not been terribly successful at being bad people, I suppose is the point." Aziraphale was always so thrilled when Crowley did something good. He shoves back the memory of his smug face when he realized the goats were alive and continues the conversation. "Wouldn't really know where to begin. I mean, it's easy to just, avoid doing bad things one's been instructed to do, yeah, like, conceptually. But that's all... big things. Apocalypse. Murder. What's the opposite of gluing coins to the sidewalk?"

"Giving them to another?" Good is rather relative and complicated, is it not? But that level of nuance... small steps first, yes? "From here, it seems you instinctively already know what you need to 'do good' when things are dire."

He rubs his chin. He's never had to... try to explain in detail the step by step process of such a thing. He's very much lived by flying by the seat of his pants and just sort of fell into the whole hero business. And people largely seemed satisfied with his rather vaguely encouraging answers before.

"But for the small things..." He tilts his head and taps one of his ears. "Listen to people. What can I do to help with their current troubles?"

That's always been his guiding principle, even if his reasons for it changed over the years.

"When I inevitably leave, I hope that their lives are a little better after my passing than before."

"Are there even coins here? I'm going to have to get a job if I want to have money for... to live on, ugh, let alone to run about-- philanthropizing with." He sighs and slumps further along the back of the bench.

"You're doing good deeds now, then. Listening to me talk. Not sure as anyone would really fancy spilling their troubles to me."

Magisteria Text Mingle #1

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